FEARS: Life Changing

I am reading the book Birthing from Within which was on my midwife’s reading list. The book encourages mothers-to-be to think about their worries and fears related to pregnancy and motherhood. I’m sure I will have many more as time goes on, but I want to start with a particularly relevant one now.

The many ways life will change after becoming pregnant

I have always been pretty independent- I loved living by myself when I was single, and traveling the world alone. I liked not having to check in with or answer to anyone, being completely selfish and doing whatever I wanted to do. A lot of that changed when I moved out to New Jersey and in with Luke. I was suddenly in a very serious relationship… partnership, really. There was someone who cared where I was and what I was up to, our animals needed attention, and the big house needed cleaning.

That still wasn’t a big deal- I enjoyed my life change and was fine with the responsibility. We still party and drink, I have girls nights, attend CrossFit classes, do photo shoots with friends, have impromptu barbecues, and plenty of other things. We just have to make sure we take care of the animals, feed ourselves, and keep the house relatively tidy.

My lifestyle is about to change dramatically. I will have to stop drinking and doing crazy CrossFit classes. I will spend time researching baby stuff and preparing for the arrival of the little one. Once our baby is born, I will have to keep the house much cleaner and spend a lot more time doing laundry. I won’t be free to come and go as I please- any time I go anywhere I’ll have to plan a bunch of extra time to get the baby and its stuff ready. I’ll never travel with one small purse again!

When you have a baby, you suddenly have a LOT more responsibility, and quite honestly that makes me nervous! As cute as they are when they’re little, I might just be looking forward to the time when the baby is not so utterly dependent… old enough to run around and play, entertain themselves, and maybe even help with the chores!

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