There are some pregnancy symptoms that you always hear about like morning sickness, and some that you never hear about like constantly bruised-feeling tailbones and random new cowlicks (I swear, I never had a cowlick there before!!!) I’d say that the hormone swings are somewhere in the middle. Most pregnant women put on a happy face when they are out and about, and answer the constant, “How are you feeling?” question with, “I’m fine!” So unless you’re her husband or closest confidante, you may not know the depths of emotions she’s going through.
I have just been consistently irritable for the past while- I just try not to focus on it so that my hormones don’t totally take over my behavior. Every once in a while I let go, though… Yesterday after Luke and I went shopping and registered for the baby, we got home and I still had a list of things to do. I snapped at Luke for getting comfy with his video game controller (I normally do nothing more than silently express my disapproval haha… I am mean…) and made him stop and come work on a letter we needed to write together.
When I finally sat down to relax a bit later, I said wistfully how I’d love a glass of wine… We started up an episode of Grimm (awesome show!) and Luke reheated some White Castle burgers (I didn’t care about that, but yuck) and cracked open a beer. I kind of bitched him out about how I’d driven the past couple nights because it would be nice for him to be able to have drinks out at dinner with friends and family, but now that we were at home where I am not supposed to be tempted he was drinking my favorite kind of beer in front of me… He asked me if I wanted him to dump it out and I said yes. Honestly it made me feel good to see him pour it down the drain.
I know, woe is me… it just sucks that women pretty much have to put their lives on hold while they are pregnant, whereas their husbands can keep up any behavior they like. I can’t play club sports, pick-up sports or crossfit, but Luke is off a couple nights a week still doing the stuff we used to enjoy doing together. I can’t drink alcohol, but he can have his martinis and LITs whenever he wants. I am uncomfortable and exhausted much of the time, and he is the same as ever. On top of that, I am an introvert and normally would feel more relaxed in social situations with some energy and a glass of wine, but now I am just tired with no social lubricant so it’s a lot more difficult for me to be fully present and participate in group conversations.
I know it’s all for the sake of this wonderful, healthy baby my body is nurturing, but the stress of this massive lifestyle change, combined with missing my family and having raging hormones has made me much more irritable than usual. I hate that I am snapping at my husband, but it feels justified when I am doing it. I don’t want to be mean, especially when he’s such a great husband and father-to-be… it’s just those moments when things build up.
What do you do in these situations? Do you just go with it, and let your emotions fly (he’ll understand…) or do you suck it up and try to be the best little wifey you can?